Friday, April 26, 2013

Tattoo Thursday: The Big Reveal

Tattoo Thursday Friday

Welp, I promised you a final post with the big reveal of my tattoo. So here it is!


In case you are a little confused, that is not a tattoo but a baby.

The reason it has taken me so long to post about getting this tattoo is because... we are pregnant.

So, I guess instead of tattoo posts I will be writing more prego, crazy hormones, sleep deprived,  crazy hormones (lol) posts.

For my tattoo loving friends, do not lose hope. I will be getting the tattoo- just not until the new year.

The Baby Story:

Many of you know that Adrian and I decided to start trying for a baby last year. In late November, I suffered a miscarriage at around 8 1/2 weeks. I was amazed by all of you who reached out in love and support during that time. Thank you.

When we found out we were pregnant again I was blown away at my mixed emotions. Don't get me wrong. I was 110% excited and humbled to have the chance at pregnancy again. But I did not anticipate all the fears because of the miscarriage.

Last week, Adrian and I went for our first ultrasound. I was nothing but nerves for two reasons. I scheduled this ultrasound before I realized that I was going to be around 8 1/2 weeks once again. It was too much of a dejavu. I just prayed.

As I laid there ready for the ultrasound to start, the nurse (a sweet friend of mine) asked if she could first pray. Her words will stick with me always. She prayer for God to "show us exactly what He wanted us to see." Leave no doubts.

When the first ultrasound showed up. I wanted to cry.

While the baby looked more like a bean than an infant there was one thing that stuck out brighter than anything else. A heartbeat.

I have never seen a heartbeat so prominant. It was like it was beating just for me to see. Could this be my God in the details?

Then, another thing blew my mind. I was nervous about seeing a baby at 8 1/2 weeks. What if it looked healthy but was a day before or the same day along as the baby I lost? I couldn't have peace about that. 

The baby measured closer to 9 weeks. 

God is in the details. 

Now, as a Mom, I am fully aware of how precious each heartbeat is. There is no guarantee that I will not miscarry this child too just as there is no guarantee that my other children will live longer than me.

But I can be thankful for this little life today.

Oh, and do you know what else? Just in case you are not convinced yet that our God is in the details... this baby, since it measured larger than we expected... his/her due date is Thanksgiving day. 

God is in the details. I will give Him thanks. This baby is a gift- as is any life we are given. Thank you God for always reaching out to hold my hand- through pain, through happiness, through fear, and through joy. 

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone.

Tattoo Story: Part 2 The Story Behind the Tat
Tattoo Story: Part 1
Miscarriage

8 comments:

  1. Reading this brought tears to my eyes. I love that God is showing Himself to you in the details. I can't wait to love on another lil' Traurig. Congrats Amy and Adrian xoxo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Dee. He always reveals himself in the simplest of details, huh.

      Delete
  2. I am a friend of Christy's (and the family). I followed her link to this post. I knew you had a miscarriage because I was asked to pray for you. I, too, had a miscarriage in February '08 and got pregnant again in the following July. That pregnancy was a success!! He was born with some health issues, but 4 years later we are a happy family. Sadly, when we decided to try for another, about 5 months later I had to have an emergency hysterectomy and the only children in our future are our grandchildren. Your words made me cry, I couldn't vocalize how I felt then and still have a hard time talking about everything, so thank you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kristen, I am so sorry about your losses. Thank you for your kind words. I cannot imagine the pain of what you have had to go through. Praise God for the birth of your son and the hope of building a family beyond childbearing. After posting about our miscarriage I was astounded by the number of stories I heard from other Moms. Still births, miscarrying twins, and even other stories of infertility. Where is God in the pain of a Mother's loss of dreams and hopes of having a family? I do not have the complete answer. But I guess part of that is the beauty. God is always in the details and when we look- sometimes for months/years- He will reveal himself. His will, power, and plan.
      Praying for your beautiful happy family. :)

      Delete
  3. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  4. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  5. So excited for your family and so thankful for God's incredible gift of life! We have been truly blessed with 3 wonderful children and we will be praying for you, the baby and your family as your continue on this journey! Emilee is going to be so excited!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Lisa or your prayers and encouragement. I cannot wait to hear Emilee's reaction. :)

      Delete